Obituary: Skiv

Skiv (Filthy, Filthy Rat) died last week in the Freeloader bar. His untimely death was brought about by Azure (Cybernetic and Loopy Blue Fox) serving him several glasses of Plague Water (Mythical Cure for the Black Plague, Made of Eleven Herbs and Spices, Unicorn Horns, Transformer Sparks, My Little Pony Cutie Marks, The Courage of GI Joes, the Tummy Symbols of Care Bears, and the White Suit of a Kentucky Colonel all fermented and distilled in a retort.)

After roughly the third glass, Skiv appeared to be in some distress, and Alkaryiske (Shiny Dragon Who Is Two People in One) and Jason Redford Drifter-Trenner (Interdimensional Wolf-Dragon-Fox-Machine of Mystery and Extra Tails) attempted to revive him.  Such attempts were unsuccessful. Hope of rescue was lost when Jason and Azure’s attempt at resuscitation caused the death of all of Skiv’s parasites.

No service will be held, nor burial.  His body lies in (such a) state outside the Freeloader, where he may commune in death with the alcohol and vermin he so loved in life.

Bacteriologists and entomologists at Neopolis University mourn his death as a blow to their fields, as entire genera of bacteria and metazoans became extinct with his passing.

Alisande Silverlode (Silver Vixen of Time and Space Magic), when asked for comment said, “Though it seemed he was thought bad medicine, a plague on our lives, the truth is he was close to many, almost inseparable, and his death is a shock to us all.”

The Plague Water could not be reached for comment.