Olympic Dressage

The hottest sport in this year’s Olympics is surely the Dressage event, since that’s what my talk show host friend told me. For dressage, you will be displaying artful ridership, a sort of equestrian dancing, though our event will not limit participation to equines. Anyone willing to wear tack and be ridden can enter. This will be a performance event similar to the synchronized swimming or gymnastics events.

The rules will require that all the “mounts” have riders, ideally from the same team. If the mount and rider are from different teams, the medal will count only toward the mount’s team’s count. Top hats are optional.